I know we all love roasting marshmallows over a campfire. Some of us even indulge in
the ritual of fluffer-nutter sandwiches. For the uninitated, that's peanut butter and
marshmallow fluff on bread, preferably white bread. Others of us hide in our apartments,
watching reality TV in secret and eating fluff straight from the jar. You know who you are.
Recently, I have learned to my dismay that those delicious yet completely vitaminless commodity, the marshmallow, is raised in very inhumane conditions. The little blobs of
sweetness are raised in huge cabinets, kept completely dark, except for one television screen, which shows an episode of "Grey's Anatomy" on a continuous loop. These innocent creatures are
fed nothing but air and sugar. They only see the light on alternative Wednesdays, when they are allowed outside for a few minutes to run laps to the music of Celine Dion and Limp Bizket.
Your campfire marshmallows are not cruelty-free. Your fluff is tainted with the powered sugar of innocent little blobs of gooey goodness.
Act now. Join the many celebrities and regular people who have joined the campaign for
free-range marshmallows.
Peace, out.
Bono
PS For $25 a year, you can adopt a marshmallow.
